With the lull before the Super Bowl and Super Tuesday, I'll fill the void with Super Wedding Progress Update (or lack thereof)..
The first item of note is that my geeky dream of getting married on 08/08/08 is all but gone. Once we started pricing tickets from the U.S. to Hawaii and from Japan to Hawaii as well as coordinating with my school vacation calendar, we realized that we had only a few options. The weeks around July 4th are difficult for people in the U.S. wanting to use frequent flier miles (although the tickets aren't priced that much more). And from the Japan side, once regular schools are out for the summer in mid-July, prices climb and as they approach the Obon holidays in early August they become astronomical. Right now our first choice is Monday, June 16 and our second choice is Monday, July 14. The reason for Monday is that it would allow people to fly in on the weekend, attend the wedding and have at least a week of vacation before flying back. Also Monday should be easier (hopefully) to find locations, photographers, etc.
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As for other details we've spent hours searching and sending out dozens of emails to coordinators and to others asking for recommendations, etc., but are still at square one. We figure that the most important thing is to find a wedding coordinator we feel comfortable with and then have her (I assume it will be a her) guide us through various options. Unfortunately, we have yet to find a website that offers ratings or reviews of wedding planners. Of course most websites offer testimonials from satisfied customers -- I want to hear from people who were both satisfied and unsatisfied and not selected by the people who want our business. In any case, we are enthusiastic about a beach wedding followed by a reception at a restaurant or hotel although we toss around a lot of other options such as renting out a huge house for the day.
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Anyway, there you have it. We are at engagement +1 month (and possibly wedding -4.5 months) and have nothing concrete done. The only thing that keeps me from spontaneously combusting from stress right now is the thought that once the wedding (June) is over, the Ph.D. (April) is over, and the move (February) is over, I can live a relatively stress-free life -- for about a month I'm sure before the next thing hits, whatever that will be.
To quote the Browns, the Cavs & the Indians; "There's always next year". That's a Cleveland tradition.
ReplyDeleteYou may not find a planner who can pull it off within 4 months.
Good luck. I have never planned a wedding. Although I would like to.
Maybe your cousin will give me the chance some day.
Brian,
ReplyDeleteWith Baby #2 on the way in April, June/July is a little early for travelling to Hawaii. Will you be planning a trip to Arizona in the near future?
It's too bad that Huckabee did not have Romney's money! He is a much less plastic candidate and it would be refreshing to see him battle Obama for the presidency. Guess I will need to hold my nose and vote for McCain...
Uncle Jerry - I am certainly hoping my cousin will give you that opportunity one day, too.
ReplyDeleteAnd to my other cousin - I'm sorry you guys won't be able to make it but we certainly understand. No plans to go to AZ (or anywhere) right now. We have to make it through the wedding first. Maybe at Xmas time we will make a U.S. trip hopefully including AZ.
I like Huckabee's upbeat message and sense of humor but I don't think he'd have widespread appeal. McCain scares me quite a bit -- he does have widespread appeal. I'm hoping Romney gets the nomination. I don't know why the right hates McCain so much. He has a conservative voting record, he's a war hero, and seems very honest and straightfoward and I think it's refreshing that he clearly has convictions and sticks to them even if some in his party disagree. If he gets the nod he will be tough to beat in November because the right will have to go with him and he will attract many moderates. It's going to continue to be a very interesting political year.
Anyway, good luck with baby #2 and please say hi to the AZ contingent for me (and thanks for leaving a comment on the blog)!
Brian
Brian,
ReplyDeleteThanks you for your check and congratulations on your paid up debt.
The wedding on the beach sounds very nice, but with so little time to plan and not much planned, have you thought about the idea of getting married in Japan, and taking lots of pictures and then having a great reseption here where everyone can attend and see the pictures of the Japan wedding?
It is a difficult and long trip to Hawaii, and as much as everyone would like to attend, many cannot take 3 days to travel and then a day for wedding and a day for all the before celebratons. It does not leave much time if anyone would want to take advantage of being in Hawaii. I would rather spend the money on the two of you than on the travel. Just a thought for what it is worth. Love, Aunt Peg
Hey Bri,
ReplyDeleteStinks that you are having such a hard time with the wedding planning, especially with everything else you guys have going on. It wasn't easy for us to plan our wedding and we had over a year so I can't imagine trying to do it in 4 months and in a different city/country. Maybe consider Aunt Peg's idea - I'm sure planning something in Japan would be much easier for you guys and then we all could help out here and more people could attend.
Love,
Debbie and Brian
Thank you for your feedback (and yea for being able to leave a comment!) Yumi and I have been and continue to consider all options, i.e. Japan and/or Hawaii and/or Cleveland. No matter what we end up doing there will be problems and issues. As far as planning more than one wedding/reception, it would involve more work and require more time off work for Yumi (also I need to be in summer school for mid-July to mid-August). We'll continue to take as much into account as we can and hope to make the best choice for us and everyone else. Incidentally, Yumi's family prefers Hawaii to Japan, as well. If people can't make it, we will understand and we hope others will be understanding of the tough choices we have to make.
ReplyDeleteBrian
Brian,
ReplyDeleteUncle Jerry makes a good point. What is the rush? This is one of the most important days of your entire lives. Do you really want to rush the plans? Because you are planning in Hawaii, proper ettiquette and common courtesy to your guests would be to send out a "save the date" card with itinerary info now, if you haven't already done so. You may want to consider waiting 12 months or so to ensure a beautiful wedding for both of you and your guests.
Good luck to both of you!
Love, Larry and Mary
Thank you for the etiquette advice. We will send everyone the date when it is set. It looks like it will probably be June 16th to accommodate people with frequent lier miles. Four months should be time enough to make plans. We're sorry, but having it at Christmas is not feasible as it will be very expensive and we simply don't want to wait a year to get married, as we are anxious to start our life together. As we said before, we understand that people might not be able to come or might not wish to travel so far, and we will ertainly understand and look forward to seeing you in the States.
ReplyDeleteBrian (and, by extension, Yumi) -
ReplyDeleteI don't mean to sound pushy - quite the opposite, actually. I just want to give you a little friendly advice from a happily married man.
Your marriage is a lifetime; your wedding is a single day. Don't kill yourself trying to plan the perfect wedding that does not exist in reality. And, from the looks of things, reality is biting you on the bum.
You have the worst possible setback: two families on the OPPOSITE ENDS OF THE EARTH. Your pick of Hawaii is a good compromise (and a beautiful location, or so I'm told) - but it is still quite an expense for anyone to get there.
To make things short: you are getting a lot of "good" advice from your family. I'm telling you now: ignore it. Anything you do to cater to your family will end up making things harder for Yumi's family. Anything you do to cater to ANYONE's "advice" will ultimately upset someone else instead. It's a sucker bet - don't play that game.
Plan the wedding day that YOU want. Your family loves you, and the attendees at the wedding will be the people who fit the following criteria:
a) They care about you and your marriage ceremony, and
b) They have the time and money to meet you in Hawaii for the ceremony.
Those who don't go to the wedding can safely plead B, without letting A ever enter into the discussion.
You are a good man for not raising your hackles in response to the suggestions that you postpone your marriage, or double your expenses by having two ceremonies. Man - I'd be on the phone shouting if I were in your shoes.
Good luck. Stay firm. Get married already, and get on with the copious number of babies!
;-)
- M
Wow. Thanks for the input. As for "copious babies" we can discuss that another time. Or not. :-)
ReplyDelete